The Oprah Chronicles

My sister, Mary Beth, is beside herself with excitement. This week, she will meet Oprah Winfrey. Yes, THE Oprah Winfrey. I first found out about this momentous upcoming event by a post she printed on her Facebook wall:

“Going to Opra . . . . . . . what to wear?”

I responded immediately and suggested two things: Number one: Wear a piece of MY jewelry and number two: Add an “h” to the name of television’s most famous person. (It’s Harpo spelled backwards, dear sister).

My sister is one of the cutest women you’ll ever meet. And there’s no one who gets more excited about new clothes and new jewelry. Each year she goes through my newest designs and picks out presents for all her friends and, of course, herself. And she is the perfect model. She tells me that every time she wears a necklace I’ve made for her, people stop her on the street and ask her where she got it.

I should probably arrange it so people can buy the pieces right off her neck since they rarely follow through by going to my website.

But all that may change this Thursday, when Mary Beth is a guest in the audience of America’s most watched talk show. “People have to wait forever to get tickets,” she said. “It’s like Bozo Circus was when we were kids.”

The pipe dream is that Oprah will say the same thing to her as the saleswoman at Lord and Taylor said today when Mary Beth showed her the necklace she’ll be wearing on the show. Oprah will shake her hand (I hear she shakes the hands of all her audience members) and say, “Girl! Where DID you get that necklace?” Yes, a pipe dream, I realize. I’d settle for a quick shot of my sister in the audience that I can freeze-frame and capture, and then forever market my jewelry with an “As Seen On Oprah” tag.

We’re not yet sure when the show will air. Hopefully my sister will have that information on Thursday. There are rumors that an upcoming show will be Oprah’s last with Dr. Oz. Could it be true that Oz signed his “death warrant” by making provocative comments about stem cell research during his recent appearance with Michael J. Fox? It’s more likely that this schedule has been in place for months, since the news of a Harpo-produced show with Dr. Oz ala Dr. Phil. Regardless, I wonder who really goes to the Oprah show to see the guests?

It’s Oprah who is the star. She’s certainly a star-maker, and a star-breaker. Hmmm. I wonder what she thinks of turquoise.

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